I'm not entirely sure where to start in on this entry. This week has been a continuous reflection on this school year in many dimensions. God is bringing me full-circle in some ways. College is such a growing experience. It has completely removed me from my home and comfort zone and transplanted me academically, physically, emotionally, intellectually, and spiritually. College is a holistic challenge- all of life is condensed into a campus and classroom setting, which can be daunting and downright exhausting at times. I can honestly look back at the fall and see a different person. I have been stretched this year so much. It has been a healthy stretch at times, and at other times a very painful stretch nearly to the breaking point.
Where have I been able to see God in this? Well, everywhere. Going to college has been a very big test of faith. To live in an atmosphere where your very ideas about who God is and how He intersects with your life are not always shared and in some instances are challenged is difficult. My experiences this year have been where the rubber meets the road in my faith journey as a Christian. I have been through some of the darkest times, times when my doubts seemed insurmountable and greater than my faith, and a great time of personal conviction of my own sinfulness and the ways I have poorly handled change and conflict on a spiritual level.
Today I attended a memorial service for a fellow first- year student who died in a tragic accident over spring break. Though he was not a close friend, I was reminded of how life touches life- grief affects a community, no matter what the connection. I was also reminded of how short life is- how fragile- and how we live lives in danger of death at any moment. We are not promised tomorrow. In Acts 17:25, we are told that it is God who gives us every breath and who sustains our lives from day to day. How then should we respond to Him? How then do we live our lives if we have not the guarantee of tomorrow or the next day?
I was overwhelmed during the service today by how many people love me, and how often I don't tell people how deeply and truly I love them. Yeah, it sounds corny. But this is the truth.
How much more does God love us? Words cannot describe that. As I was reflecting on the untimely death of a classmate today, I was reminded that Jesus loved us so much that he was obedient to death- even terrible death on a cross. THAT is how much.
May this truth sink even deeper into my heart and yours, dear reader- and may we live lives flowing out of that truth in every way.
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